But I can’t go out - everyone will judge me
How many times have you stopped yourself from enjoying your life - because you have gained some weight?
Maybe you have stopped exercising or playing a sport? Maybe you are too embarrassed to see friends because you want to avoid that surprised look on their faces when they see just how much bigger you are now? Maybe you don’t want to go shopping because you can’t stand seeing yourself in the mirror or don’t want to deal with how awful it feels not to be able to fit into any clothes? Maybe you don’t want to go dancing because you don’t want everyone to laugh at your wobbly tummy and thighs? Maybe you don’t want to go on any dates or be intimate with your partner because you just hate your body so much that there is no way anyone else could find it attractive?
So many of the people that I work with have put their lives on halt until they reach their “perfect” weight. They have stopped going out, seeing friends, doing things they love to do because they hate their bodies and are afraid of how others will judge them. Yet without realising, by doing this, they are completely sabotaging any of their weight loss efforts.
When you stop doing lots of things because you hate your body/weight - this can cause you to obsess even more about reaching a particular weight and make you feel very bad about yourself. As you feel bad about yourself, you are much more likely to over-eat or binge eat, just to get some comfort from food. That together with the fact that you now have much more time (since you are not going out/exercising/socialising etc. anymore) means you also have much more free time to over-eat and no real distractions from thinking about food. Stopping yourself from going out and doing things because of your weight will trap you in a very vicious circle - where you just end up putting on much more weight because of how bad you feel about yourself. It is very common for people who feel bad about their bodies and weight to turn down a dinner invitation because they shouldn’t be eating the “BAD” restaurant food and should be on a diet - only then to binge eat lots of chocolate and crisps because they feel so bad about themselves.
One wonderful way to break this cycle is to force yourself to go out. Accept the dinner invitation, go and meet your friends and go back and play that sport that you love! Whilst it may make you feel uncomfortable at first - it will certainly stop you from obsessing about food/your weight and over-eating because you feel bad. Not only will enjoying your life make you much happier, it is also likely to make you slimmer in the long-term.
Another great way to break this cycle is to change the way you think about yourself and food. The Food Psychology Clinic can help you to change your thoughts so that you have a better relationship with food and your body - email firstname.lastname@example.org to book a free consultation to find out how we can help.